There are days when I have too much time on my hands and I begin thinking weird thoughts like "What IF...?"
Then there are those nasty and evil thoughts of Woulda-Coulda-Shoulda that enter my mind....these can be very painful, very enlightening or just plain stupid.
I would have finished college if I didn't get bored with it.I could have been a lawyer if I stayed in college.I should have stayed in college and become a lawyer so I could pay for my kids to go to college and then quit.OK I digress.
What IF I never went into the Army after High School?
What IF I played college football instead?
What IF I married my High School Sweetheart? (did not have one but hey what if?!)
What IF I never had any children?
What IF I became a roadie for the Rolling Stones and Keith Richards was my best friend?
You can really drive yourself nuts with the
What IF game.
Maybe it's part of the "getting old" disease. This is a terrible affliction and if you begin to show symptoms get help immediately!!!
You begin to have a morbid fascination with reading the obituaries; you begin to care less about what other people think; you suffer silent pain; you begin to feel a sense of urgency about your life and the time you have left; you think about the things you have not yet done but want to do
(and you think of these things often); you spend part of your day reflecting and taking stock of what you have accomplished in your life because it matters more today than it did yesterday for some reason; you appreciate things that have lasting appeal (great works of art, wonderful writing from gifted authors, music that moves your soul, true friendships, a great tasting wine); you yearn to travel the world because the stuff around you is...well...boring. OK, OK, maybe it IS Mid-Life Crisis.
Pathetic huh?
Getting old means you actually consider a face lift (Gene Simmons NEEDS a face lift---Keith Richards could use one...have you noticed lately that he resembles a chimpanzee? Look at a face photo of Keith real close---it's at the top---go back and look at it)--If Keith was my best friend I would tell him---hey you're looking like a chimp...better layoff of snortin' what's left of DAD. Getting old means you leak...wrap your head around that one. Getting old means becoming a VIP user at your local pharmacy. Getting old means you need to constantly carry or wear a pair of eye-glasses. Getting old sucks...where did that barnacle come from? What did you say? You're who? Are you sure I am married to you? What smells?
Thinking can be Exhausting.
I am thinking about getting a Real Estate License. Joy wants me think about it and then she wants to talk about it and most likely wants to worry about it before I actually sign up for the class...which is funny because she was the one who suggested I look into it. I have been fascinated with the idea of home selling...it's not about "selling" as much as it is finding a right match. Understanding what a couple or family or an individual person wants and needs in a home and a neighborhood and helping them find the right choice sounds interesting AND challenging to me. It's a LOT of work and I think one would need to be committed, passionate and very organized to do the job well. The upside is that you are in control of your own destiny--you are an entrepreneur--working for yourself and getting back what you are willing to invest of yourself...and it requires marketing skills which I can steal from my thirty plus years of doing radio.
Speaking of Radio...sometimes I get the feeling that I have reached that point where I am not willing to sacrifice for the sake of doing Radio. I realize it sounds selfish, maybe even stupid since Radio is my career and source of financial income, however, I am fairly certain that I am not willing to move to Cleveland or Detroit for a radio job. I am fairly certain that I don't want to work for programming types who don't have a clue but have some sort of status or position. I am very certain that I don't want to chase after a radio job that pays a paltry salary or to work for a radio company that thinks you are worth less because you are unemployed--it's just disrespectful to my craft and profession, yet radio is full of these types of people---looking to do everything on the cheap---and in essence that is what is wrong with Radio today...desperate times!
